I came across this dating article on one of the blog sites
I read every now and again. I thought that it was humorous, spoke the truth,
and informative wrapped up all in one piece. I know that many readers of my
blog and people in general have wondered how one dates in Middle Eastern
countries, especially in a country where strict guidelines are established. So,
on a day such as this where love is meant to be celebrated I thought it was
fitting to share this article with you. I hope this read will answer your
questions.
SAUDI
DATING SCENE
Written: February 22, 2011
Source: http://www.blueabaya.com/2011/02/dating-saudi-way.html
Dating? In
Saudi-Arabia?
It would
appear that there is no such thing as dating in Saudi-Arabia. The countries
strict laws on gender segregation make sure all contact between the sexes
is minimized. There are no movie theaters, restaurants and cafes are
segregated by gender and single men are denied entry into malls and even parks.
This makes
dating in the western sense practically impossible, driving young men and
women to meet online in forums where the virtual dating scene is flourishing.
Nevertheless young Saudis find ways to go around the rules. Where there is a will there
is a way as the saying goes.
Sometimes dating and flirting attempts from young Saudi males tend to go a bit
overboard though.
Here are some
examples of my observations of the Saudi ways of dating.
Going grocery
shopping.
Tamimi supermarket seems to be a popular place to go looking for
girls/boys. Some Saudi girls go here “grocery shopping” usually with a friend
or a maid in tow. She will be donning her flashy abaya and most
likely have very strong make-up on.
Any interested guys (all of them) will then have a chance to give her
their numbers. This happens by standing close by and repeating the number over
and over. She may or may not accept the offer. Some guys think the
uninterested girl might not have heard him and keep following her in the
store.
A couple that
takes interest in each other must seem like they are casually picking up
groceries while doing this to avoid getting thrown out by the security. It’s
sometimes hilarious watching these things going on in a grocery store!
Role playing
Another tactic is pretending to be husband and wife. The interested guy goes to
the girl, grabs the cart and starts walking next to her as they were a couple.
They can chat freely while pretending to shop together. The guy will pay for
the groceries. This way they could also leave together in the same car and
drive to a house where the parents aren’t home.
This happened
to me once, a guy just came and grabbed my cart and started pulling it from me
despite my protests. We were yanking the cart back and forth for a while. First
I imagined he thought that it was his but when I pulled out my mobile to call
my husband the guy went nuts. He started frantically repeating his number to me
while still hanging onto my cart. By the time he realized that I was
in fact calling my husband and not eager to hear his phone number he ran like
the wind out of the store!
Bluetooth and Blackberry Street
Tahlia Street is a popular place for men to
sit outside at its numerous cafes and restaurants. Women or families are not
allowed to sit outside, they are all male-only singles sections. The boys
will have their toys parked on the street waiting to attract the girl’s
attention. This street gets very congested with traffic in the evenings,
especially on weekends. Some girls go driving around with their drivers
putting their Bluetooth on looking for guys with nice cars. Read more
details here:http://marketplace.publicradio.org/display/web/2008/03/12/meaw_pm3_saudi_dating/
Boys cruising in expensive rides can try to attract girls to contact them
by putting Blackberry PIN number stickers on their cars. Sometimes the guys can
be seen hanging out of car windows waving papers with their numbers on the.
Mall madness
Another popular place for meeting people are the shopping malls, particularly
Kingdom and Faisaliah mall. Although it might be tricky for the single guys to
enter because security guards don’t allow them inside. But there is an easy way
around it. Either the men take their sisters or try to enter with a
group of unknown girls as fake brothers. Some women are known to take advantage
of the guy’s desperation and will walk in with the guy for a charge.
The napkin
technique
Group of two or more guys stroll around the mall searching for girls they
like (all of them). They make sure to have their expensive watches and phones
on display. If a girl sees a guy she is interested in, she will walk past and
subtly drop a napkin with her name and number on it. The guys then rush to pick
it up. They can continue strolling the mall and Bluetoothing or chatting
on their Blackberries while flirting with each other from afar.
Desperate losers
Some guys are so desperate they even resort to calling random
mobile numbers hoping for a girl to pick up. When they do reach
a young female, the game is on. The calls will keep coming constantly, usually
in the middle of the night. Shouting, name calling and slamming the phone on
them will only make the guy more enthusiastic.
These guys simply won’t take no for an answer. I’ve found that having my
husband answer the phone and have few words with them is the only way to
stop the phone harassment.
Fair game
Naturally, not all Saudi girls are looking for a date or to have some fun
flirting with guys. In fact I think the majority couldn’t care less for these
types of guys. But whether the girl is in a grocery store, a shopping mall
or happens to be in a car on Tahlia street they seem to be viewed as prey to
some men. The certain type of Saudi male views all girls in any of these
places as fair game.
This can lead
to a lot of annoyance and even dangerous situations like guys chasing
girls in their cars, speeding and violating traffic rules. Perhaps all the
strict separation of genders and preventing normal human interactions is what
makes many Saudi males so aggressive in their attempts to talk to women.
To my surprise the company purchased a corporate suite and
gave us tickets to attend the F1 festivities in Bahrain. That also came with
hotel accommodations. When I heard that I would be attending, it brought back
memories of how I used to attend the event in Abu Dhabi and its numerous
concerts. Those were good times! 
I have been in this mall on a few other limited
occasions, but on today my observation skill were more in tune. As a result of
my awareness, look at what my eyes had the pleasure of gleaming upon. It’s a
mall signage banner with its “rules” for entrance into the mall. I guess those
with natural hair can’t come to the mall!?! Discrimination or not?
The Golden Rule – “Treat others the way you want to be treated” is a conceptual framework viewed as the ethic of
reciprocity. The ethic of reciprocity effect has roots around the world and is
widely seen as the standard method many cultures utilize to resolve conflicts.
March George Singer, an American philosopher, believes there are two ways of
looking at the Golden Rule. The first way entails one performing specific
actions that you desire others to do unto you. The second way involves one
managing their behavior in a manner that they would like others to do.
